Will Rogers was a man of many talents. He was the son of a Cherokee judge in Oklahoma and became one of the greatest political country/cowboy sages of all time.
Here's a sample:
- Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
- Never kick a cow chip on a hot day
- There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
- Never miss a good chance to shut up.
- Always drink upstream from the herd.
- If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
- The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.
- There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
- Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
- If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
- Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
- Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
- The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every year.
- Worrying is like paying on a debt that may never come due.
- Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
- Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
- Never squat with your spurs on.
- A fool and his money are soon elected.
- You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.
- Lettin' the cat outta' the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
- After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.
- Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
- Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
- Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
- A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
- The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you.
- When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
- The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
- The income tax has made liars out of more people than golf.
- Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far.
- If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.
Jim was a writer-broadcaster, producer and presenter on television and radio for 40 years. He is also a host on Lifestyles 55 Digital Radio. Find Radio Redux and Mid-Century Memories it at www.whatsupwinnipeg.ca